Finding Positivity Among Struggles

Written by Fenny

Back then, during the secondary school and college days, I was slowly hearing voices and feeling sensations of hallucinations. I was an angry person too. When I get frustrated, I would throw things around in my room and later pick it up. Then I would walk out of the room as though nothing happened at all. I was not aware that I have an issue with my mind. The decision was made wrongly when I chose for Science subjects instead of Arts subjects in my college days, and I could no longer cope with studies.

I felt as if my life had crashed when I could no longer have a study life. My family told me to go and work and I drifted from days to days. I switched from one job to another. 

There was a turning point when I got to know of my Christian friends. They introduced me to the world of Jesus Christ and God. I started to love going to church. Reading the bible was a way to learn English and I got really happy to be able to read again.  And it was a lifestyle filled with meaning and purpose. From then onwards, I found full - time jobs that I can commit to. I took my medications regularly, which helped me cope with the chemical imbalances in the brain. 

But my educational mindset told me to turn negativities into strengths to persevere and stay hopeful for the future. (“化悲愤为力量“)Going to church to listen to sermon also helped me to rebuild, recharge and repair myself. I learnt not to be an angry person, to love God and love people, and many other values from going to church to be more emotional stable and mentally stable. John 3:16 "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believed in him should not perish, but have everlasting life” I learnt to focus on life. I also learnt to repent and change for the better. 

One lesson I had learnt is that If you think that everything is over, don’t think this way. You would have been planted in the soil of obstacles and struggles to learn how to build yourself up. This environment is the one to challenge you to be stronger and better.